In the throes of a thesis & pretending everything is fine

I did this to myself. It’s not a requirement at my school to write a senior thesis in order to graduate, unless you are in the honors program, which I am not. But for some reason, my junior year I thought it would be a great idea to take on a thesis as a way to “wrap up everything I’ve learned”. Fast forward to now, 2 days before I need to do an oral presentation of my paper, about a week or so until the hard copy is due to my thesis director, and there is no end to my paper in sight.

I’ve essentially been living at Starbucks every morning before class because apparently it’s the only place I can get any work done. (When I try to work at my apartment, I usually end up either napping or mindlessly scrolling through all of my social media apps for approximately 3-6 hours – I am trash & have no self control.)

I like feeling like I know what I’m doing though, and even though sometimes I feel like I’m in over my head, or that I’m an academic fraud pretending to be something I’m not, every once in a while I feel like a real “grown up” college senior who has her shit (somewhat) together, and I like that feeling a lot.

I’m an English major through and through, I love words and language and I always have. This paper lets me do all of the things I love and feel like I’ve accomplished something with the knowledge I’ve gained over the past 4 years at school. I just need to remember that I (kind of) know what I’m doing and I just have to goddamn do it on time and I’ll be a proud author of a 20 something page thesis.

Now I should stop procrastinating by writing this blog post and get back to finishing the thesis I just banged on about for too long.

Stay rad,



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